cuttingremark | Salon buddies for @favoriteanalyst

Salon buddies for @favoriteanalyst

It started about a few months ago. Loki needed to relax after making the mistake of spending his winter holidays with his 'family' (which ended in another spectacular fight with Odin that resulted in one broken window and a lost snow globe Loki has thrown through said broken window), but his normal esthetician was booked solid for the next year and couldn't fit him in outside of his own pre-scheduled appointments no matter how much money he offered to throw at her. Wanda was the best in the city, probably the whole country, so it made sense, but there's still the issue of Loki needing something to relieve his tension so he didn't strangle his paralegals. The thought crossed his mind of setting up a tindr profile for a quick fuck, but he isn't in law school anymore and that was just a disaster waiting to happen.

Wanda saves him from making a bad decision by texting him the information for another technician she helped train. She claims he's new, but very talented, which he figures will do in a pinch. The link she sent him takes him to a rather outdated looking webpage for the "TVA Salon and Spa", an older establishment that apparently started in the 50's as a barber shop, but recent made the jump to full salon under new management. Despite the clunky UI, he's able to schedule an appointment for a basic manicure the very next day with the young man Wanda had told him about.

Casey is a nice young man. Not anywhere as skilled as Wanda, but his nails come out looking acceptable with their basic black polish and the hand massage he gets to begin with is utterly divine. He doesn't go into detail about his family problems, but the other gets the gist that the holidays were strained and is more than willing to play the oh-so-important role of listening ear even if his platitudes do ring a little hollow.

When the appointment is over, Casey hands him a card for a free deep conditioning treatment or 30 minute shoulder massage.

"These are really just for family and friends," he explains, "but you really seem like you need something to help you relax." He thinks about declining, but decides it isn't polite and takes the card anyway before handing the young man a $400 tip.

The stern looking woman at the front desk gives him a serious look as Casey nearly passes out in the background. "I'm going to be checking those to make sure they're real."

"But of course, I would expect nothing less." His usual winning smile does nothing to lighten her glare as she rings him out. She asks if he wants to use the card to schedule something today. Why not? It's a charming establishment and he has some free time coming up.

The masseuse the card is good for, Bee, is apparently booked solid for the next month, but the stylist, Mobius, just had a cancellation in the following week that fit perfectly in his schedule.

That appointment was the beginning of the end for Loki.

So in he walks six months later, having ditched his normal high-end stylist for a middle-aged man who looks like he works in a cubicle rather than a up-and-coming salon. It isn't his normally scheduled appointment, but his cases have been crazy and Thor just left for his "journey of self-discovery" aka backpacking across Europe, so all of Odin's attention is now on his youngest.

Joy.

If Loki were the sentimental type, he'd think it a shame that the lobby area of a salon is more comfortable for him than his childhood home.

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"Okay. Be right back."

No big deal to pour a couple glasses of scotch. He would not like to get Loki drunk if at all possible, but if his boyfriend decides he can't go through the story without doing so, then... Well then maybe the story can't be told yet. But they'll give it a try.

He comes back, bottle on the coffee table, handing over a drink, keeping one in his own hand as he settles on one end of the couch.

Gives Loki whatever space he needs to start.

Loki takes the glass and immediately throws half of it back. He thinks for a moment, looking at the space Mobius left him, deciding if it would be easier with contact or harder. Seeing Mobius' face to gauge his reactions seems important, but Loki's always been a tactile creature.

He settles for scooting closer, angling himself so one leg is up on the couch, while the other hangs off, brushing against Mobius' shin.

Deep breaths.

"En is my ex. Met him at a gay bar...junior year of undergrad? Or summer between junior and senior. Doesn't matter. He was older than me by at least 30 years, but he was handsome and a smooth talker. We seemed to just...click. I moved in with him not long after."

Deep breaths.

"Everything seemed to be going fine. Great even. It all happened so slowly, like a frog in a pot of boiling water."

Deep breaths.

"I'd been exploring kink a little on my own before. When I told him, he said he was interested as well, suggested we get into it together." A deep breath that turns into a hollow laugh. "The first red flag was when he said we didn't need a safe word, but I didn't see it then. We were going so slow and surely if I told him I didn't like something he would stop. He never tried anything before, so I didn't have anything to worry about."

Deep bre- it catches in his throat. Loki pushes it down with the rest of the scotch.

"Fuck, sorry. I haven't talked about this in a while."

Frankly, 'he's my ex' would've cut it. Exes are hard enough as they are. But clearly it's more than just a bad breakup.

And it's hard. For Loki, it's hard to set up the story, to go through the details that he clearly thinks are necessary. And Mobius already hates this man. Because it's not hard to see some of the places this story is going.

For his part, he's only taken a steadying sip of his drink. That Loki's already polished his off...doesn't bode well. He reaches for the bottle to refresh Loki's glass and sits himself a little closer. Not crowding, he hopes, but certainly easier to touch.

"Take your time. I'm not going anywhere."

Loki gives him another smile, more real this time and full of appreciation. He scoots closer as well and swings his leg up and over Mobius' lap.

"Are you sure? It doesn't...it isn't a pretty story. I wouldn't hold it against you if you didn't want to hear anymore." An out, in case Mobius doesn't want to sit through the details of Loki's first real, and worst, relationship.

Mobius sets a hand on that leg, a nice warm little rub. "I'll listen to whatever you tell me. You don't have to push yourself to say it all if you don't want to."

Edited 2022-09-21 18:29 (UTC)

He's giving Loki an out, and for some reason that makes Loki want to tell him even more. This is what he wants Thor to see: the sweet man who can stand up for himself, and for Loki too. Who takes care of Loki and wants him to be happy.

Loki focuses on the warm hand on his leg, using that to anchor him to the present. Had En ever done something like that? Just gently caresses or held Loki not for his own benefit, but purely because Loki enjoyed it? If he did Loki can't remember.

He takes a deep breath, and it's a little easier this time.

"Things escalated, but I didn't realize how bad it had gotten. I just thought that's how kink relationships were. We didn't go to clubs or brunches, there wasn't a community around me to tell me no, Loki, that's fucked up. It...it all came to a head one night. I had a friend over- an acquaintance really. I'd already graduated, but she was a year behind me, needed help with some class or other so I invited her over. I should have known it would upset him, he never liked it when other people were in 'his space'."

Always his, never theirs.

"She left just after he came home, could probably feel that he didn't want her there. As soon as she was gone he exploded. Called me all sorts of horrible things, handcuffed me to the end of the bed. Started to...to hit me. The worst part is none of it was unusual by that point. I just thought he was right, I had been bad and so I was being punished. If I had just met with her somewhere else this wouldn't have happened."

Another sarcastic laugh before he takes a drink.

"It would have. I would have gotten home too late for his liking, or not fixed dinner the right way, or messed up some other little thing. But then he did something new. He left."

He pauses, looks to Mobius for a reaction. For a sign that he's said too much.

There is so much wrong in all of that. In a way, it highlights how fucked up Loki had been. To get into a relationship so fast, and then allow it to devolve in such a way. Not at all Loki's fault, of course. He got charmed by an older fellow who knew better. Knew enough to seek out someone young and inexperienced in the lifestyle. Someone with issues. Someone easy to manipulate for it all.

It's all awful. It's hard to hear. But it's necessary. He won't abandon Loki like had apparently been done before. On one hand, no wonder Thor was so concerned. On the other, did Thor really think he was anything like this?

Mobius blinks. "He cuffed you, beat you while you were cuffed, and then left you?"

Tremendously fucked up, and his wide gaze shows it. It clicks a bit of the puzzle of Loki into place.

"You don't like it if I were to leave the room while you're tied up. Jesus, no wonder."

Loki just nods, taking another sip. He wants to throw it back, let the burn glide down his throat and numb the memories, but he doesn't. He didn't go to therapy for all those years to turn to alcohol like that now.

"It's been over ten years and I can still hear the jingle of his keys and the slamming of the front door. At first I thought it was a joke. I called out to him, but the house was so quiet. Too quiet for him to have pretended to leave just to see what I'd do. That's when I actually started to panic. I had no idea how long he'd been gone, I was in pain, couldn't catch my breath. I have no idea how long I was there, just crying. I didn't know what to do, until I remembered I'd put my phone on the charger in the bedroom right before my friend came over."

It's horrible, but this is the part where it starts to get better. Loki can feel the lightness begin, the same fluttering that always happens when he gets to this part of the story.

"I'd set that model up to only take voice commands if it was charging. It was terrible with Asgardian names, but the one it did recognize consistently was 'Thor.' He told me later he broke the door in, but I didn't hear it. The next thing I knew he was there like some kind of superhero out of those comic books. I begged him not to call the emergency line, was afraid how upset En would be if I 'caused a scene' at his house-- he was starting to go into politics at the time. So Thor bundled me up in a blanket and took me to the hospital. I was there for a couple days, needed surgery to reset a rib. Funnily enough I think that's what convinced Odin to let me leave the country for law school."

It isn't funny, at all. Loki knows that. He still remembers his mother's tears. Thor's tears. Odin's quiet fury as he asked Loki who did this to him.

Quiet fury is something that could describe Mobius. He doesn't want to let the anger through, because he doesn't want to scare Loki off, give him any bad impressions. But it's there, simmering under the surface, along with the horror.

He finishes his glass, sets it down as gently as he can so nothing breaks. His hand is still on Loki's leg.

"What happened to En?"

At that, Loki looks away.

"I just wanted it to be over," he says, voice so low it's almost a whisper. "Odin wanted to press charges, even though the relationship going public would only hurt his campaign, but I...I just wanted to leave. I'd already pushed my admission to Harvard back a semester because En asked me to. I didn't want to risk loosing it altogether because of him." Excuses. He could have pushed it back, but then there would have been a trial. Telling a lawyer about all the sordid details of the relationship, seeing him at the trial.

The chance it would all be for nothing.

He doesn't directly answer Mobius' question, but he hopes it's enough for him to infer.

"Loki."

Mobius reaches out, catches one of Loki's hands, holds it firm between both of his own. Warm and steady and sure. He wants to catch his boyfriend's beautiful eyes.

"If I ever meet this man, I need you as my go-to lawyer to know that I will put my fist through his face."

Loki huffs a laugh. He looks back to Mobius, eyes starting to shine at the declaration of intent to do bodily harm.

"I think that might constitute a conflict of interest." It's a shitty joke. Loki sets his glass on the coffee table so he can bury himself in Mobius' soft sweater unfettered. For a moment he sits like that, breathing in the scent of a man who loves him and feeling safe despite it all.

"I can live with that. What's a little jail time for defending the honor of my boyfriend?" When Loki leans into him, Mobius wraps both arms around him, holding him close. "But maybe should make sure we've got someone that's less conflict-y on hand just in case." Not that he imagines it'll ever happen. One asshole who knows where who knows if he's even still alive? What are the chances of running into him?

"I will never do that to you. I want you to be safe and happy."

"I know you won't." Loki's grip on Mobius' shirt tightens, but he doesn't look up.

"I don't blame Thor for being overprotective, he saw the worst of it. But you aren't like En! At all! You're kind and caring, and I trust you and...and I love you." It's not the first time he's said it, but the phrase isn't easy for him. He's sure, but saying it out loud feels like tempting fate.

"I don't know how to show him, and I don't know how you can convince him. He'll either come around, or he won't." And that's Thor's problem at that point. "So long as he stays civil, then we're fine. He doesn't have to like me. He just has to tolerate me. Because I love you."

"He'll come around eventually." Loki shifts again so he's basically sitting on Mobius' lap, head resting on his shoulder. "You're the best thing that's ever happened to me. He's dense, but he isn't blind."

"Maybe we should have a little sit down when he comes back. If he does. Maybe a good talk will do it. But," he continues, keeping him held tight, "we've got each other. And that's enough."

"He has to come back. All his shit is here." Thor could get a hotel, but instead he'd been staying in the 'guest room.' (All of the toys safely stashed away.)

"If he's in an okay mood. He's gotten a lot better about it, but sometimes when he's worked up you can really see the Odin in him."

"Look, the only other idea I've got is for him to watch us have sex, and that is not going to happen, so."

Still. It's vexing. "He's seen you get better, though. You're more knowledgeable about the kink scene than I sure as. You vet your partners. You know what you're doing. He doesn't see that?"

Loki chuckles. "I wouldn't want him watching either, so I think that's a moot point."

Reaching out, Loki takes Mobius' hand, threading their fingers together on top of his legs.

"It's less the kink and more our age difference." It doesn't bother Loki in the slightest. He's met plenty of young men who remind him of En much more than Mobius does. But Thor... " Despite the fact that I am much more careful with my partners now, all he sees is his little brother with an older gentleman. He's worried I'm being taken advantage of again. He was worried about En too, but I kept telling him everything was fine." Loki rubs his thumb over Mobius' knuckles.

"I think part of him blames himself for me getting hurt."

"Were you happy with him?" He can't imagine that Loki was, but it apparently went slowly. Lots of abusive relationships start out happy. "If you seemed happy with him...then I get it. There's not much you can say, because that's all Thor's going to see. Calm before the storm."

"In the beginning, but even then I don't think it was him. He made me feel wanted and it was...intoxicating. I always felt like everyone's second choice, especially compared to Thor, but here was someone who actually preferred me." Loki shakes his head.

"I don't think he ever actually cared about me. Not as a person, at least. I was an object to him. A doll to own and show off when it suited him. Whenever I got hurt he always focused on how it looked, if it would somehow mar my appearance. It's why I never got my ankle never got seen about. He couldn't see it, so it wasn't a real injury."

Mobius had seen him with his cane in the colder months, Loki having said it was just an old injury that never healed well. After spilling his guts, he doesn't realize he never told Mobius exactly what injury caused it.

"That's your old injury," he states with such incredulity. It makes sense now, but he hadn't quite connected those dots. Ankles could be anything. Fall off a bike as a kid. Trip down some stairs. Anything. "That was him."

He has to swallow around the white hot hate for this man he's never met, blink it back a few times. "And Thor's afraid I'm like that?"

"Not directly, it was an accident. I mentioned going to the doctor and he said I was being silly. I just needed to put some ice on it and take some asprin. So that's what I did."

Loki nods against Mobius' shoulder. "Like I said, it's dumb and he's wrong. The most wrong he's ever been about anything. Which is quite a feat, I might add."

"I liked it better when I thought it was just a personality difference instead of him being afraid I'm going to start beating on you." Because one of those hurts a little more, frankly.

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